This morning was a little rough on Belle, and it all started when Dad said goodbye as he was headed out the door to work. She had a mini meltdown and was pretty worked up until I turned on her current favorite movie (Rio 2). Must be something about those colors and the music that she can’t help but dance to.
Lately it seems like we’ve been having more bad days than good ones. Belle has really been on edge, which in turn puts us on edge. Every time we’ve thought things were getting back on track it’s all been thrown off again. Tempers have been short; minds have been lost; a fresh patch of gray hair has made an appearance.
It’s been stressful, upsetting, confusing, and–frankly–annoying.
Like many other families, we find this time of year to be especially busy. Not only do we have the holiday season among us, but we also have many birthdays to celebrate, as well. As much as we enjoy getting together with family and celebrating those holidays and birthdays, it also causes a lot of stress.
I think every parent worries about their child going to school. It seems that in the current times there’s a lot to worry about. We leave them all day long in the care of someone else, and have to trust that they are doing their best to make sure our child is as safe as possible. We have those same concerns, but one thing that stands out above all others–for me–is bullying.
Bullying remains a huge problem, and anyone can be a victim to it. It’s unfortunate, and extremely sad. I want to hug every child that has experienced bullying, and explain to them that it’s not their fault. In fact, if you have ever experienced, or are currently experiencing bullying, please know that it’s not your fault. The short-sightedness of others causes them to feel threatened by anything that is different. Even adults get weirded out by little bugs, and squash them.
At this point it’s no secret: Belle has autism.
Things like communicating, expressing how she feels (except anger; she’s good at anger), and breaking her focus can be troublesome for her. She always has to have something in her hand, and a lot of times is trying to put something in her mouth that she shouldn’t. We don’t experience a lot of meltdowns, but she’s had them, and they f***ing suck. The worst one led to her putting her head through a window, shattering the glass, and cutting her forehead (story to come). We’ve since replaced all of them with windows that have tempered glass.
This isn’t everything that makes up her autistic characteristics, but it’s a generalization. The truth, though, is that everything she does isn’t always because of autism.
